hurts

why does it hurt so much.

i miss him everyday,every minute, every second of the day.

saw him earlier today in town with someone.. i felt like someone was stabbing a knife through my heart.

i have to be strong and not contacting him. just have to believe that this is for the best.

i said horrible things to him, really want to call and say that 'i'm sorry' but then the thing between us will never end.

i miss his smell, i miss his kiss.

why do i love someone so much, someone who is capable of hurting me. someone who i don't even know if he loves me, misses me, or have any kind of feeling for me.

it is hard.. i want to call and hear his voice, i want to go over there and hold him tight in my arms. but we both will only end up hurting each other again.

is he... is he the love of my life? guess time will tell. not being in contact for a bit might be a good thing, hopefully it will show how we feel about each other.

but right now, one thing i know for sure is.. i'm missing him like crazy, and he is still in my heart.